we pray and we pray and we pray every day

well, the prednisone has hit. sometimes this stuff makes me kind of maniacal. I want to talk talk talk and eat eat eat. I keep thinking it is all in my head and that there is no way I could feel it so quickly, but I do. I have lost almost 20lbs since June and I think I just ate like 12 pieces of pizza, I'll probably gain it all back in the next week. boo to that. Anyway, my xray was "normal" so I am on the pred and hopefully that will solve my issues. I actually recorded myself breathing after I walked up the basement stairs today, but I can't get it to post, sounds like darth vadar.

Anyway, I said I would post my Q and A thing today. Only one persn had a pregunta, which made me feel a bit audacious to have even proposed such a thing, but anyway...my Q and A:


What percentage of each do you feel:

1. scared of the future, versus
2. grateful for what you have, versus
3. excited when you wake up in the mornings?

Is it 10%, 60%, 30%, or ......?

So, I tend to lay in bed at night and worry about the future - I worry about my kids (in general) I worry about not seeing them (as in early Cf death), I worry about my husband and my marriage - I worry a lot at night. Seeing this is mostly a nightly occurance, I'd day it probably equals about 5% of my weekly time.

I try to be grateful for what I have and give thanks just as much as I worry. I tend to say little prayers throughout the day, like, "please let my son have a good day and school" or "thank you for bringing my husband home safe," that kind of thing.
so again, I'd say maybe that equals, really, like another 5% of my time

I am rarely excited in the morning. I am not a real peppy positive kind of person, so unless I have something really special going on, excited is not how I start out my day. So that would be like 0.01% of the time.

When I stop to think about it, I guess most of my waking time is spent being busy, taking care of house and kids and school, so I thankfully don't have too much time to ruminate on my fears, but in the same token, not enough time is spent giving thanks for what I do have, either.